From: Craig Phillips [cphillips@cnci.ccsend.com] on behalf of Craig Phillips [cphillips@cnci.us]

Sent: Tuesday, April 03, 2012 8:03 PM

To: cphillips@cnci.us

Subject: Cocktail Talk - Sustainable Time-Wasters

 

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Cocktail Talk

 

June 2012

Cocktail Talk

Craig  

Welcome to CN Consulting's "Cocktail Talk".

 

Cocktail Talk is a casual monthly newsletter intended to arm you with amusing bits and bytes of information on whats happening in the computer world. Topics sure to break the ice and capture an audience at many a social or business event.

 

Cocktail Talk is archived on www.cnci.us

 

Currently, on Cocktail Talk -  Sustainable Time-Wasters

 

Cocktail TalkSustainable is the new Green. Sustainable energy, sustainable Job Programs and sustainable Time-Wasters.

 

Unlike a traditional Time-Waster that can be won or completed, a Sustainable Time-Waster is a dynamic, growing waste of time that takes on a life of it's own. 

 

The ultimate in Sustainable Time-Wasters, just  my humble opinion, are the following.

 

Urban DictionaryCash 4 CadaversTexts From Last Night, and F My Life.

 

Urban Dictionary has 6,387,025 definitions. You can look up words and phrases, browse by letter, use it's thesaurus and even look up your name.

 

Urban Dictionary is like Wikipedia in that the community contributes the content, but doesn't seem to have much in the way of moderation. Take Shantel for instance.

  

I think it's important to point out that 6,387,025 definitions does not mean 6,387,025 words, phrases or names. There can be many definitions applied to the same word, phrase or name. Take Shantel for instance.

  

Shantel (redacted)

A Gorgeous girl, who is nice and funny. Sometimes emotional. She smiles alot and likes to have a good time. Long hair. Nice ass. She has alot of money. She is always there for people. She has a great sense of style. But get her mad and you wish you never did cause you will be put on the spot.  

-or-

A shantel is someone who always thinks that she is right. Doesn't like anyone, and will do anything to get a guy to like her. She likes to be two-faced and a whore. She usually gets STD's from people because she sleeps around so much. She has bad teeth, nasty black hair, and never showers. She doesn't have any true friends.   

 

What really gives Urban Dictionary a life of it's own is its free Word-of-the-Day emails. Every day we're entertained by definitions like this;


Rick Perry Strong

 

To use hate and bigotry to spread a political message.


Named after Republican presidential candidate Rick Perry's infamous video/ad of the same name.

 

Rick Perry lover: If we want to fix our economy, we need to stop giving welfare to the minority races.

Normal guy: Oh no he's gone Rick Perry Strong! Quick let's get him to a psychiatrist before he starts talking about making his religion and homophobia mandatory.

 

Cash4Cadavers. (c4c) 

 

It's a Dead Pool. You can get in on it once a year and there are currently 68 teams competing for cash and prizes.  You don't have to be in it to watch though. You can sign up to get emails telling you who's passed away, how many points they're worth, and what teams got them.

 

Bill Janklow (1939 - January 12, 2012), former governor of South Dakota  

 

Talk about learning your legal expertise firsthand! Even before he was named Attorney General of S.D., good ol' Bill was arrested for drunk driving (while not wearing pants). Then a 15-year-old girl accused Janklow of rape (did I mention he was her legal guardian?). The case was dismissed for lack of evidence, but she was mysteriously killed in a hit-and-run a year later. And then Janklow sued various entities for libel for covering the case.

That didn't stop the good people of South Dakota from electing him governor - four times. To cap his career, Janklow was convicted in 2003 of manslaughter for running a stop sign, killing a motorcyclist.

Dead of brain cancer. Never let it be said that what goes around doesn't come around.  

 

2000 points to teams 1, 23, 27, 28, 29, 30, 33, 54, 59, 66, 68!

  

As if that's not enough, the Cash4Cadavers website has exciting and entertaining links too. Links like The Dead People Server and The Internet Movie Database.

 

People die every day making c4c as sustainable as our attraction to the Dead Pool and the long list of public figures teetering on the edge of extinction. The emails keep it coming.

 

 

TFLN is so popular it has an iApp you actually have to pay for. You can still use the full website version freely.

 

The TFLN community seems to be mostly college and post college (not graduates) which is a head's up as to the focus of the content they contribute.

 

(606):

 At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?

 

(608):

 I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.

 

 (905):

Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.

 

A full bottle of Vodka, empty heads, and Mommy paying the Cell bill make TFLN highly sustainable. You get to vote on these entries too. 

 

Someone doesn't like it though, and set up a virus trap for anyone mistakenly trying to access tfln instead of textsfromlastnight dot com. Be aware.

 

F My Life  (FML)

 

FML is nowhere as crude as TFLN, and has an iApp that's free. FML is about the embarrassing, uncomfortable, unjust moments that happen to everyone.

 

Today, while I was getting ready to take a shower, I placed my phone on the counter next to the toilet. While I was washing my hair, someone called me. My phone was on vibrate, so I didn't hear it until it vibrated off the counter and into the toilet. FML

#18881874 (224)

I agree, your life sucks (2183) - you deserved it (3072)

On 01/22/2012 at 5:03pm - misc - by needanewphone - United States (Illinois)

  

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

#18845928 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (9388) - you deserved it (1502)

On 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by MakesMeLol (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

 

You even get to vote whether they had it coming or not. There's a never ending supply of calamity and as long as people can laugh at themselves, and others, FML remains sustainable.

  

  

Sustainable, or not, funny, or not, that's your call, and that's Cocktail Talk.

  

  

 

Thank you for reading,

 

Signature 

Craig Phillips

CN Consulting, Inc.

 

 

CN Consulting, Inc - www.cnci.us
Computer Consulting for Business!

 

 

CN Consulting Inc. (CNCI) is an independent consulting company formed in 1990 and located within easy reach of both Chicago and Milwaukee.

 

CNCI maintains a select client base providing consulting services concerning the use of information technology. We persistently look for advantage to our clients in added value and reduced cost made available by advancing technology.

 

CNCI does not have financial interest in any given product or product line. We evaluate current and emerging technologies solely based on their benefit to our clients. CNCI implements the solutions it recommends and readily partners with companies that offer products and services to the advantage of our clients. CNCI offers complete client support with singular accountability.

 

We maximize the benefit of our clients' existing technology, systems, and platforms while integrating the benefits provided by new technology.

 

Business Continuity and Business Development are our goals with Continuity being the foundation of Development.

 

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