From: Craig Phillips []

Sent: Tuesday, January 01, 2013 11:04 AM


Subject: Cocktail Talk - Doritos & Mountain Dew


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Cocktail Talk


January 2013

Cocktail Talk

Dear Craig:   

Welcome to CN Consulting's "Cocktail Talk".


Cocktail Talk is a casual monthly newsletter intended to arm you with amusing bits and bytes of information on whats happening in the computer world. Topics sure to break the ice and capture an audience at many a social or business event.


Cocktail Talk is archived on


Currently, on Cocktail Talk - Doritos & Mountain Dew


Cocktail TalkSome people, when Christmas and New Year's fall on the right days, parlay some of their hard earned paid vacation into an extended holiday. Some go to work and take advantage of the quiet to close out the year. Others use the time to reflect on last year's events and plan for the coming year.


Last year, a guy calls me up because he's contracted a virus. His internet takes him everywhere except where he wants to go, his Start Menu programs have all disappeared, and his My Documents folder is now empty. This is his business' only computer and the only copy of years and years of important data. This is a very big problem and can I fix it first thing tomorrow morning. Yes, I can.


He was up and running before noon. He wasn't even there, everything was fixed while he attended meetings. Nobody even need know that all their data had gone missing. Four hours start to finish. Long story short I gave up more than 4 billable hours that day to come to the rescue. Yet somehow, the bill was too much.


Two weeks later, same guy, different virus, takes it to Squeak Squad. One week later, after being without his business' only computer, the one with all his client and financial data on it, he gets a call from Squeak Squad. It's not fixed, but they did their best, and he should buy a new computer anyway, and come pick it up, and pay at the register.


Squeak Squad may be teens and college kids on break earning minimum wage, but don't be fooled, you'll be billed $150 an hour. $100 an hour for sales calls. You pay the parent company. 


Booz Allen & Hamilton bills $150 for their squeaky new kids too, but they have Master's Degrees, and Squeak Squad is not Booz Allen & Hamilton.


You can take your computer to Squeak Squad and for $200 they will do a list of things to it that may or may not resolve the problem and " Provide you with an estimated cost for hardware repair(s) or upgrade(s) needed to provide a complete solution.". $200, about 3 days work for a Squeak Squader at minimum wage, to get an estimate. 


For $300 you can have one come right to your office. Be sure to get plenty of Cool Ranch Doritos, Spicy Hot Cheetos, and Mountain Dew ahead of time so you don't have to go on snack runs. Maybe they'll stay the full three days, in which case you'll have to order pizzas, but don't count on it. 


Most importantly, cancel everything that has anyone coming to your office whose opinion of you is important. Because while you know how much you're paying, the casual visitor isn't thinking anything more than minimum wage, and if you don't value your business you must not value theirs.


Maybe you're not in business, don't have an office, don't have client data or an image to protect, and don't think you need a professional. Maybe you'd rather drop off your PC and shop a few Flavor Flav CDs or a microwave oven while you're out since you can't shop online.


A friend of the family in her 80's needs computer help from time to time. We spend the day together, take a break for soup and sandwiches, walk the dog, fix what's wrong, and talk about computers. She gets a case of the guilt's (told me so), and the next time her PC goes on the fritz she takes it to Squeak Squad. She said; "I thought it would be about $50.".


Yes, they kept her PC for over a week. No, they did not fix her problem. Yes, they charged her anyway. Yes, they talked her into buying a new PC and paying them to install it in her home.


Instead of being without a computer for a week only to buy a new one anyway, text your sister and see if she can swing by with your nephew after she picks him up from school, feed him Doritos and Mountain Dew, talk with your sister for a few hours, and go buy a new computer. 


Stock up on Doritos and Mountain Dew, and text your sister (it'll make Mom happy), or not, but that's your call, and that's Cocktail Talk. 



Thank you for reading,



Craig Phillips

CN Consulting, Inc.




CN Consulting, Inc -
Computer Consulting for Business!



CN Consulting Inc. (CNCI) is an independent consulting company formed in 1990 and located within easy reach of both Chicago and Milwaukee.


CNCI maintains a select client base providing consulting services concerning the use of information technology. We persistently look for advantage to our clients in added value and reduced cost made available by advancing technology.


CNCI does not have financial interest in any given product or product line. We evaluate current and emerging technologies solely based on their benefit to our clients. CNCI implements the solutions it recommends and readily partners with companies that offer products and services to the advantage of our clients. CNCI offers complete client support with singular accountability.


We maximize the benefit of our clients' existing technology, systems, and platforms while integrating the benefits provided by new technology.


Business Continuity and Business Development are our goals with Continuity being the foundation of Development.


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